The Village
by Saiororen
Summary: It takes a village to raise a child. It takes a child to raze a village.
1. Chapter 1

"They say it takes a village to raise a child" Greg said.

"This is how a child can raze a village" Greg said.

Greg sat down and Mrs. Brodrick simply stared and said, "well done greg"

Greg laughed and went home.

He filled a bag with broken dreams and crushed bottles.

"God's journey is my will today!" he roared towards the heavens.

"Bones will fly, blood will mend, and tears are thicker than red!" he screamed.

Manny ran around in anger.

Greg stood beating his chest.


	2. Chapter 2

"Violence, war, and anger. These are the things I dream of" Greg spoke.

"A lord never feasts when his people starve you see" Rowley replied

"Out of turn once more you ingrate and shall lash you with your intestines maggot!" Greg roared back.

"Everything alright in there...?" asked Mrs. Jefferson

"The revolution begins with the seed my dear madam" Greg replied.

"Well, ok then..." replied Mrs. Jefferson

"You peasants are too foolish to see my true vision, my true genius!" Greg spat.

"Eugenics should have been continued, specifically for you children of gnats!" Greg spat.

"Well, excuse me." said Mrs. Jefferson.

"Excuse you indeed, dog-woman! A peasant does not spoke to a lord unless they wish to be a spoke upon a wheel and hung!" Greg said.

Mrs. Jefferson said, "21 gon get the stick. Flexin on dat ..."

Greg's hand slammed on the table and he said, "Silence woman!"

"I feel like me and taylor might..." Mr. Jefferson trailed off noticing the building resentment.

"What trash do you beans listen to in this hovel!" Greg railed.

"Braille you..." said grabbing Greg by the ear and yanking him away.

"UNHAND ME!" Greg bellowed and bit violently into Mr. Jefferson's hand.

A chunk of 's flesh dislodged itself into Greg's mouth, and blood welled up into it also.

Greg gagged at the coppery salt taste and began vomiting.

Rowley drop-kicked Gregory in the balls so hard that you don't even want to know.

Greg screamed and projectile vomiting onto Mrs. Jefferson who had spun kick to make a massive gouge across Greg's forehead.

"Blood and earth! Blood and earth!" Rowley screamed as he began stomping on Greg's testicles.

"You shall live and die a man with no children" Rowley screamed.

Greg screamed and began biting Rowley's leg.


	3. Chapter 3

"The seed of a passion fruit has been said to ignite the entire world in flames. Uniting man and beast, sea and earth, god and devil. To know passion is to know evil, and to know good is to know passion. For wheretofore can thou exist without passion. What is life without love. And what can love without life?" Greg spoke.

"You freaky bastard!" Rowley yelled, "You talk like you sound smart, but you are just so damn stupid man"

"Greg" Greg groaned in the hospital bed.

"Sometimes I think you are right, but you are right to be wrong, cause you choked on a schlong. Faggot all along." Greg said.

"Rap now... first shakespeare prose verbose bullcrap and now this, what's the matter with you..." Rowley said

"Injun, engine, thomas the train, I'll train your bitch if she don't behave" Greg said.

"Snap out of it" Rowley said smacking Greg.


	4. Chapter 4

"The broken garden lies in wait" Greg gasped

Rowley punched him in the stomach.

"Smooth muthafucka, get through otha fuckas" Greg said

Rowley punched him again.

"The sun rises in a planar eclipse within our own world, on the realm of gods, we must be akin to dust..." Greg gasped

Rowley punched him again

"I been snappin the bitches, They tryna get in my britches, Funny bitches on bridges, I fucked em get riches" Greg said

The doctor came back in and exclaimed in horror at seeing Rowley.


	5. Chapter 5

"Why are you troubling my patient" the doctor said pinning Rowley to the wall.

"He keeps shifting, there's a trigger switch in his stomach, every time I punch him, he switches from rap to prose and vice a versa" Rowley said

"I'll be the judge of that... " The doctor paused, "FAGGOT!" then he slammed his hand into Rowley's throat and began beating his face to a bloody pulp.

"Faggot.." the doctor said.

Then the doctor stepped back.

"21 21 21 21 21 21 21 21" The doctor roared while belting out some sweet justice onto Rowley's stomach.

Then the doctor backed up and yelled "WORLD STAR!" and with a running start kicked Rowley in the dick so damn hard that Rowley became a woman.


	6. Chapter 6

Rowley, who now was referred to as Rowlette was escorted away by the police, as X by 21 Savage and Future blasted in the background.

As Future said, "21 gon get the stick" The officers took their nightsticks and began beating Rowlette.

Rowlette got carted away and handcuffed to the side of the squad car.

"Fucc 12!" yelled the doctor, flipping the police off.

"Ayy! Bitch ass, We boolin right now faggot" The police said.

Then the police drove away and the friction began shredding Rowlette's fresh new adidas superstars apart.

"Fucc 12!" she cried, "This shit was brand new"

She began banging on the side of the squad car.

An Uber driver was drinking coffee as he saw this and loudly exclaimed, "UBER EVERYWHERE!" then he choked and his coffee and died.

His death throes caused his foot to lock on the accelerator and his car crashed at 120mph into the squad car killing everyone except for Rowlette who miraculously survived but in critical condition.

"Don't fuck with me bitch.." the doctor said staring at the wreck then he rolled up a backwood and smoked it.

That doctor's name, ... Albert Einstein.

"Just kidding!" he laughed, and revealed he was actually...

GREG HEFFLEY?!


	7. Chapter 7

So how could this magnificent doctor be Greg Heffley you say?

Where they ever in the same room?

Exactly!

Back to the story...

Rowlette lay in a mangled and bloody heap and Greg, that's to you by the way, stood there pondering.

"Power is Voltage squared over resistance meaning..." Greg began to drool.

"What exactly!" Greg snarled.

The truth was looming in Greg's eyes and he couldn't see it.

So it made itself seen, by smashing it's fist into Greg's eye so hard he went blind.

Greg screamed, and rabidly swore, "What the bloody fucking hell did you do to my child!"

popped his eye back in and restored his sight.

"Faggot, ingrate, hellspawn. Curse upon you!" Greg screamed.


	8. Chapter 8

Mrs. Jefferson come out at that moment and swing her purse at Greg knocking him out cold.

Suddenly the heard the cries of their child Rowlette.

"Oh mi god!" they both simultaneously exclaimed and they dragged Rowlette to the hospital.

Rowlette left a bloody trail of tears and misery and flesh in his wake.


	9. Chapter 9

The doctor saw Rowlette and laughed.

"What the bloody fuck do you want me to do with this fool, Hedwig" the doctor said

"Shut up Terrence&PHillip" the doctor said back slapping himself.

"Oi silly goose, you need to focus..." the doctor yelled straightening up.

"Rats! Why are these doctors all such nincompoops!" Mr. Jefferson loudly exclaimed.

"Ay! Don't call me a nincompoop blad!" the doctor said drawing a gun.

"Yea I just pulled the 40 out on your cracker ass!" the doctor laughed.

Mr. Jefferson tried yelling a war-cry but choked and collapsed.

The doctor shot him in the balls and everyone cringed.

Then Mrs. Jefferson was shot at point black range and died.

Then the doctor grabbed Mr. Jefferson by the hair and slammed his head into the window until it broke, leaving 's face a lacerated, bruised, and bloody god damned mess!

Then he put the gun and blew out both of 's kneecaps.

Mr. Jefferson collapsed and began crying.

"Das right bitch!" the doctor roared, "I'm a fuck you up, fuck you up, fuck you up, torture your stupid ass stupid fuckin stupid cracker ass bitch!"

As Mr. Jefferson began groaning, the doctor grabbed a staple gun, and stapled Mr. Jefferson's arms to the walls.

"Ball to the walls bitch! Wall ball wall ball!" the doctor exclaimed.

"Wall ball wall ball wall ball wall ball..." the doctor repeatedly exclaimed as he began slapping Mr. Jefferson with the gun, causing him to bleed profusely.

The doctor then put the bloodied gun in his pocket and pulled out a fucking hunting knife, that was life fifteen inches long and stabbed Mr. Jefferson in his fucking ass.

Mr. Jefferson started bleeding out his left cheek, and then the doctor used the knife to carve a one inch deep pentagram into Mr. Jefferson's chest, while he screamed and spat madly.

Then the doctor pulled the gun out again and blew out both of Mr. Jefferson's shoulderblades.

Then the doctor finally stabbed Mr. Jefferson in his dick and roared, "For Hogwarts Narnia and Middle Earth faggot! And also for beating up my home dawg Greg!"

The doctor took out his gun and shot Mr. Jefferson in both his eyes, his throat, and his dick again, and Mr. Jefferson gurgled up blood and died.

Rowlette woke up and saw the blood and screamed, and the doctor accidentally fired again and hit Rowlette in the fucking boob, cause she's a woman now duh, and she passed out instant ko.


	10. Chapter 10

Rodrick spat on the ground, and put his arm around his brother Greg.

"Ay thanks Rick" Greg said.

"No problem Blad!" Rodrick said.

"Don't call me blad guy!" Greg said

"Dont call me guy blad!" Rodrick said.

Then they went into the hospital, and Rodrick said, "Ayy I need to see some medics to help my brother out foo!"

The medics came and patched Greg up but on the way he stopped by to see Rowlette, and fist bumped the other doctor who was covered in blood from his extremely violent act, and said "Thanks homes you a real g, you know that homes"

The other doctor and Greg rolled up a backwood and smoked it while listening to Psycho Pass by Xavier Wulf.


	11. Chapter 11

AN: Warning Graphic and disturbing content ahead

Rowlette awoke with a growl, her left boob was leaking, and her limbs all throbbed, bled, bruised, or broke.

She screamed at the top of her lungs and charged at the doctor who shot her in the right boob, instant ko.

Then the doctor laughed and left.

Rowlette was unconscious for a while and then woke up.

It was night out and then a janitor walked in to the room.

"When I saw your state..." the janitor groaned licking his lips, "I couldn't help but go all in all time all fair in love and war games!"

"What the hell..." Rowlette trailed off.

"What a pretty lass" the janitor growled, "then he stabbed Bruno Mars in his goddamn esophagus and wouldn't stop until the fucking cops come in!" he roared in tune with Yonkers which he began blasting from his phone.

Then the janitor smacked Rowlette with his broomstick and she began bleeding.

He kicked her in the intestines and she went ko instantly.

Or so he thought, as he laughed, Rowlette leaped up and bit the janitor's dick so hard that it fell off.

The janitor screamed and went insane. He grabbed Rowlette's hair and slammed her face into the ground, once, twice, thrice...

Her face was a bloody mess and he still wasnt done.

He tore off his pants and then grabbed his broomstick and shoved it into Rowlette's eyeball, causing it to explode in a mess of blood and gore and having it enter your frontal lobe and mess up some of the circuitry and paralyzing her.

He tore the broomstick out and blood and gore gushed out.

He began spasming and feeling dizzy from all the blood lost from his dick wound and began more aggravated and crazy.

He began violently stomping on the back of Rowlette's head and the back of her skull cracked and she began bleeding like fucking crazily.

"Then he dragged her lifeless body to the forest" he said once again quoting Tyler, the Creator as She began playing.

Finally he squatted over Rowlette's head and sharted all over her.

Then he pulled his mangled dick out of his pants and shoved it deep into Rowlette's other still functioning eye, leaving behind a ruined mess of bloody gore.

He stuck the bristles of the broomstick into his dick wound, plugging it in, and stopping the bleeding, for now, and the shaft of the broomstick, became his new six foot long dick. Then he grabbed Rowlette and stuck the broomstick shaft all the way up her mangina and it erupted out her throat. He pulled the shaft out and ripped out her intestines and other organs, and she gurgled blood and finally fucking died, thank Jesus!

Then the janitor screamed and began screaming and screaming.


	12. Chapter 12

The janitor kept screaming until his throat started bleeding, as he began drowning in his own blood, he gouged his eyes out and then began smashing his head against the wall and then began dashing around until he eventually leaped through the window, lacerated himself and fell fifty feet onto the broomstick end which was shoved out his asshole, impaling his corpse and leaving blood and flesh dripping to the ground.

This was how the police chief found him the next day, and the police chief immediately pulled out his gun put it in his mouth and fired, causing the back of his head to explode, and his lifeless body spasmed before hitting the floor.

Greg smiled, and said, "They raised me up! I shall raze them in return!"


	13. Chapter 13

As other police arrived they too began shooting themselves in turn.

An officer spotted Greg and began chasing him.

Greg side-stepped and tripped the officer.

Then Greg put the officer in a chokehold and said.

"As your breath leaves you, let it enter me! Side stepped once and no room for enemies, leave you in the dust, your body becomes history!"

Then Greg snapped his neck.


	14. Chapter 14

Greg sprinted away screaming like a mad-man and laughed while at it.

Then he took a shower assumed a normal expression and made his way to school.

While on the way he screamed, "SHIT!", as he realized he did not have any clothes on!

"faggot ass cunt whore bitch!" screamed Greg as he began sprinting home, he dashed through the front door, and put on some nice clothes, and sprinted to school with only a minute to spare.

As he sat down in his seat, two police officers burst through the door, and pointed their guns at Greg.

"Freeze!" they simultaneously yelled.

"Fucking faggot!" roared Greg, before picking up a desk and smashing it into Patty Farell's head.

As she feel down, screaming and bleeding, from the massive gouge in her skull, the officers fired one bullet richocheting off the desk leg and striking the teacher in the chest, the others were likewise deflected one hitting one of the officer's in the dick, causing him to scream.

Then Greg charged at the officers, impaling one of the officers through the neck with his desk leg.

He grabbed that officers rifle, and emptied out its clip into the other officer's head.

Then he grabbed the other officers pistol and threw his desk out the window.

Then he sprinted and dove out the window, rolling on the ground to lessen the impact, before sprinting away from the scene.


	15. Chapter 15

After Greg disappeared, the students were in shock.

They stared at the gasping teacher who was gurgling on blood, the officer whose head looked like swiss cheese from all the bullet holes, and the other officers who was gurgling blood and dead.

Then Patty Farrell came to their attention as she was still screaming.

Patty Farrell then went feral and all hell broke loose.

She screamed , "I AM THE MONITOR LIZARD RAWWWWW!"

Then she dashed at Leon Ricket and bit down down hard on his arm.

Leon roared and smashed Patty's head against the desk again and again until the bloody thing broke, cerebrospinal fluid and blood leaking out.

Then Leon pried Patty's jaws apart, put he was bleeding pretty profusely and soon passed out from blood loss and fainted, cracking his forehead open on a desk.


	16. Chapter 16

As Leon began bleeding and blood dripped on the seat, Fregley roared and bit into the teacher's face.

Bryce ripped Fregley off and punched him down.

Fregley screamed and was put in a chokehold, then Greg sprinted through the door again and shot Fregley and Bryce killing them, before leaping out of the window with a loud scream.

Then all hell broke loose as one student started screaming and attacking the others.

A massive fistfight erupted and blood and bone began flying everywhere, and some students began being tossed out the window.


End file.
